"As for me, I'll take one baby marinated in a dish please"

My last post on forums, I swear

In this high-tech age where acronyms rule the internet, infertility forums are no different. Worse than the average I would say, due to the high use of medical jargon. So understanding what some people say is almost impossible without this handy guide.

So try to remember all this.........

AC = Assisted Conception
AF = Aunty Flo or Period
AH = Assisted Hatching
AMH = Anti Mullerian Hormone, used to predict ovarian reserve.
ART = Assisted Reproductive Technology
AFM= As for me

BBT = Basal Body Temperature
BCP = Birth Control Pill
BD = Baby Dancing or Make Love
BF = Breastfeeding
BFN = Big Fat Negative
BFP = Big Fat Positive
BH = Braxton Hicks
BTW = By The Way

CD = Cycle Day
CF = Cervical Fluid
CM = Cervical Mucus
COCP = combined oral contraceptive pill
CTG = Cardio-Tocho-Gram (used for monitoring fetal heart rate & movement)

DB = Dear or Darling Boyfriend
D&C = Dilation and curettage - a procedure for cleaning out the uterus.
DD = Dear or Darling Daughter
DE = Donor Eggs
D&E = Dilation and evacuation - a procedure for cleaning out the uterus by suction
DF = Dear or Darling Fiancé
DG = Dear or Darling Girlfriend
DH = Dear or Darling Husband
DI = Donor insemination
DP = Dear or Darling Partner
DPO = Days Past Ovulation
D/R = Down-Regging , hormones taken to shut our bodies down to stop producing follicles naturally, (this is done before stimulation)
DS = Dear or Darling Son
DW = Dear or Darling Wife

EC = Egg Collection
EDD = Estimated Date of Delivery
Endo = Endometriosis
EPT = Early Pregnancy Test
EPU = Early Pregnancy Unit
ET = Egg Transfer
EWCM = Egg white cervical mucus, the kind you get when you are most fertile.

FAM = Fertility Awareness Method
FAQ = Frequent Asked Question(s)
FER = Frozen Embryo Replacement
FET = Frozen Egg Transfer
FFS = For F**** Sake
Follie= Follicle
FSH = Follicle Stimulating Hormone
FWIW = For What Its Worth

GA = General Anesthetic
GBS = Group B Streptococcus
GD = Gestational Diabetes
GIFT = Gamete Intra-Fallopian Transfer
GTT = Glucose Tolerance Test

HCG or hCG = Human Chorionic Gonadotropin – hormone produced in pregnancy.
HFEA = The Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority
HPT = Home Pregnancy Test
HSG = Hysterosalpingogram (an x-ray, similar to a Lap)

ICSI = Intra Cytoplasmic Sperm Injection
IMHO = In My Humble Opinion
IMO = On My Opinion
IUGR or IGR = Intra uterine growth retardation
IUI = Intra Uterine Insemination
IVF = In Vitro Fertilization
IVM = In Vitro Maturation
IYKWIM = If You Know What I Mean

J & K
KW = Knicker Watch

Lap = Laparoscopy
LH = Luteinizing Hormone
LMP = Last Menstrual Period
LO = Little One
LOL = Laugh Out Loud
LP = Luteal Phase, the gap between ovulation and your period.
LPD = Luteal Phase Defect, when the second half of your cycle is too short for implantation to be successful (many doctors consider anything less then 10 days to be too short for implantation).

Marmite Down = How you feel on blue days
M/C = Miscarriage
M/S = Morning sickness
MW = Midwife

N & O
NK = Natural Killer Cells
OHSS = Ovarian Hyper Stimulation Syndrome
OI = Ovulation Induction
OPK = Ovulation Predictor Kit

P & Q
PCB = post coital bleeding, or bleeding after sex
PCOS = Polycystic Ovary Syndrome
PCO = Polycystic Ovaries
P/G = Pregnant
PGD = Pre-Implantation Genetic Diagnosis
PGS = Pre-Implantation Genetic Screening
PID = Pelvic Inflammatory Disease
PM = Private Message
PMA = Positive mental attitude.
PMSL = Pissing Myself Laughing
PND = Postnatal Depression
POF = Premature Ovarian Failure
POP = progesterone only pill
PUPO = Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise

ROTFLMAO = Rolling On The Floor Laughing My Arse Off

SA = Sperm Analysis
Stims = Stimulate follicles using injectable hormones

TBH = To Be Honest
TESA = Testicular Sperm Aspiration
TESE = Testicular Sperm Extraction
TMI = Too Much Information
TTC = Trying To Conceive
TX = Treatment
TY = Thank You

U & V
UPSI = Unprotected Sexual Intercourse
US = Ultrasound
UTI = Urinary Tract Infection
VBAC = Vaginal birth after Caesarean
VE = Vaginal Examination

W, X, Y & Z
ZIFT = Zygote Intra-Fallopian Transfer

$0.02 = Two Cents - as in throwing in my two cents' worth.
2WW = Two Week Wait

So, for everybody who was paying attention……

AFM, DH and I have been TTC a LO for a bit now using BBT and UPSI (or BD). It didn’t work so I’m currently on BCP until AF. Then, using ART we are going to do IVF with ICSI and possibly IMSI using OE. I will start using stims and DH will do SA. I will go into the clinic and do VE’s (ICK) and US…I know, TMI. Then we will have EC and ET. Afterwards, I will start my POP and assume PUPO during my 2WW. TBH, after all the TX, I hope I’m P/G with a BFP!

If anybody has a QA, I can PM

…..And you thought learning OMG was tough

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